NAVIGATING MY NEW WORLD
Reorienting to a new house and new ‘hood’ doesn’t just mean locating the nearest grocery store, coffee shops, and good restaurants; it means reorienting to a new me. I’m deliberately slowing my pace from my normal high setting… read ‘frenetic’… to something more moderate. Seeking balance in time spent with myself rather than the bright shiny objects of busy-ness which easily distract me. Telling myself that no one cares if the newsletter is late, or our website isn’t perfect...and It isn’t my job to fix the world instead of sleeping at night.
All this put me face to face with an ugly inner driver -- guilt. I never would have admitted to you just how much guilt has me by the throat… probably because I feel guilty that it is so :-). I feel guilty slowing down. I feel guilty not producing.
To begin my new life, today I took my first ‘calming yoga class.‘ (Wow, that’s a stretch!) My guilty self kept composing emails while I was supposed to be relaxed and breathing deeply. Who would have thought that breathing is so much harder than composing emails?
When I finally did breathe -- evidently in yoga my normal shallow breath doesn’t really count as breathing, a huge realization popped into my not-quite-quiet-mind -- I have confused my work with me! Let me say that another way: I LOVE my spiritual work, my friends around the world, the miracles of Soul Body Fusion, the mysteries of MARK, but, as wonderful and fulfilling as it all is, it’s still only an outer layer of me. My true essence is inside of that.
For the next few months I commit to finding her because I KNOW that she has some wonderful, unbelievable surprises that she has been waiting to show me. It feels BIG! Now I’m giving myself the time to find those hidden treasures of me. The last time that I took a break was 24 years ago, that’s when White Eagle and Mark first came to me.
My new single life has had its humbling moments. I write this blog at my new coffee shop, just outside my new yoga studio. Next door is my new laundromat. I’m still recovering from the PTSD caused by my first visit there last week. You see, my current apartment doesn’t have a washer or dryer. In my old life, Ed was in charge of laundry… which he didn’t do very well. I was in charge of cooking… which I didn’t do very well either.
Never having visited a laundromat before, I arrived hesitantly with a bag of dirty clothes in hand. Of course I didn’t realize that I should have also brought: 1. laundry detergent, 2. dryer sheets, 3. LOTS of quarters, and 4. a basket for my clean clothes. I managed to wash my clothes with plenty of help from the teenager who works there. But when it came to drying my clothes, I failed. On hands and knees on the not-in-this-decade-scrubbed-floor, I did succeed in stuffing my soggy laundry into the lower coin-operated dryer. Then horror-upon-horror, I pumped my precious quarters into the wrong dryer--not noticing the arrow by the money-box that pointed UP to another person’s dryer! I lost four quarters, but worse-- his dryer was now going to dry for 20 minutes longer than he had intended because of the unexpected donation of my four quarters to his machine!
Ever chivalrous, this veteran of laundromats opened his wallet and gave me back a dollar, saying with a confident smile, “You’ll get the hang of this.”
I couldn’t get out of there fast enough, towels still damp, two socks AWOL, and vowing to hoard quarters from now on. 🙂 🙂
Many thanks and much appreciation for you and what you have given us! Thanks for sharing the wonder! Time for you to just be you! It’s allowed!
Ah, how these transitions form and inform us. It has been a long while since we communicated on this plane and I applaud this new frontier in your courageousness. I guess you are inviting a different, for you, kind of adventure into the great unknown. We all love you for that.
The last line of the last song in The MicroCosmic Cartoon Show is: “Give up the knowing and you’ll always keep growing…’Cause if you think you know, it’s much bigger than that!”
I just love your honesty !! There is no teacher who shares things like this, his normal life. This is soooo precious. My new life as a single has his interesting episodes too…… Also I need to spend more and more time with me my inner me. Light upon who is me…. 🙂 and enjoying the new easiness with my daughters. Cant wait to be with you on your next journey!
Big hug Bettina
Jonette, your trip to the laundromat made me laugh out loud. Just what I needed this morning.
Jonette – we all admire you and bask in the light of your courage and honesty. Your surrender is absolutely inspirational for us, and the message is to let go and BE Love you – Joy P. Denver group
We Love you Jonette for your honesty and your open hearteness. From all your meditations I have learned : just relax and go to 6*,7* or 8* Dim and just Be there and enjoy the Peace and the Softness. Bring that to your 3* dim and everthing goes soft with joy all day long. Easy,Your work all these years has improved our lives forever.I am and the world is eternaly gratefull to you.You are JC now……..(smile!)
Below a message from Dirk Peters from his heart.
As he doesn’t speak English, I’ve tried to make a translation.
Here a message from The Netherlands. It is also the place where we have met.
It was at an evening lecture you gave to a small group in 2012.
After the lecture, we, Hilma and Dirk, talked to you about your book the condor and the eagle.
I, Dirk, asked “when are you going to write down the real truth”.
This as I know the truth. Maybe even better then you as a lot of things happened through me.
Therefore I knew that White Eagle and Mark had say goodbye to you as a channel.
The time you could borrow them has ended, they are back to the place where they belong.
the condor ( mark) the eagle (white eagle ) are back at the place where they belong, high in the air floating over Mother Earth.
on our behalf , the condor and the eagle , thank you, as you’ve been a voice for us and have spread our words over the world.
In this way you have done all the things you’ve done in the period when we were with you and helped to grow the seed again in many peoples harts. In this way you have awakened their own consciousness again so this may and can awaken slowly and grow into something wonderful.
but now, I, Jonette , what with me now? I do not know what life is, I do not know how I should live anymore.
Jonette, belief in yourself , hope springs eternal and love conquers all.
For all the questions you have the answer is written in your own heart .
a heart that may and can do by itself without another telling how or what . the other can and may only give you advice. it is up to you what you do with it because it is your life, your heart knows the way how it can and should go further. many are there to help and assist you , only you can and should do it and nobody else. remember one thing all you need to live is yourself, your own true self. if the emergency is high, ask the question upwards and ask there that you may hear and read the answer in your own heart . that this heart may and can be opened used for the question and the answer already written in there.
Dearest Jonette, thanks that you have given yourself to be the spokesperson for us. You’ve done what we could not do at that time, thank you that you took this task. we know that it was a beautiful but also a very difficult task for you. it gave you a lot but also cost a lot. but o, JONETTE, we and all those who are connected to us are so grateful to you. we will not let you fall but will be with you in a different way, you will always have the protection in force strength energy wisdom and insight, but for all in our unconditional love and nothing on mother earth is stronger than that.
but you must do it yourself because it is your life and your path. the only thing we may and can do is give you guidance and suggestions . JONETTE again many thanks .
Dear JONETTE, here a guide to you when your time comes come to Holland and specifically to the garden of eden . this is the place where you also may feel at home. And your heart will feel at home, it will blossom into something wonderful again.
There we will meet when time is there.
with onvolwaardelijke love greetings
THE CONDOR ( MARK / HILMA ) WHITE EAGLE ( DIRK )
we and all who are with us are sending you all the strength force energy wisdom and insight you need .
also we are in everything onvolwaardelijk with you .
Dear Jonette, thank you so much for your great work in the Mark Intensive in The Netherlands. I came for my daughter, I left for me! In understanding that I had to let go, she felt my energy and became free! 😀 she is doing so much better now. She has bonded in love again with me.
I still can reach so easily the other sphere that you helped us reach.
But most of all I want to tell you that I want to send you the love and happiness of my heart to give you courage and pleasure to go through the difficult moment of becoming the change in your life.
Greetings and love
Margriet van Dooren
Right before I read this post, I was going to write you something, and I was looking around for a suitable place to do that, when I ‘stumbled’ upon this wonderful post. And of course, my post was perfect as a comment to this.
I was going to say that White Eagle pulling back is the best thing that could happen (I know ‘he’ won’t be offended). Here is why that was my first thought today: I saw a post by Ester Hicks this morning. It was great wisdom, and at the end it said ‘Abraham’ (I guess most people are familiar with them, but anyway: it is a spiritual author and her guide). I caught myself thinking a bit disappointed: ‘Ah, it was only Abraham, not Ester’. What happened, I used to love channeled material, but now I prefer human words?
It has emerged gradually after White Eagle stepped aside and gave the steering wheel to you. White Eagle is great, but now I find it more interesting listening to you.
You are slowing down for the moment? How great that is for us! The energy of you doing that is penetrating into our lives as well. This is where we live, where everything we experience in our spiritual journeys needs to be integrated. We want to fly, but very often we need to walk, and slowly too. You running around the world is great, but you walking around dealing with laundry, settling in your new home is fantastic. It is a reflection of what you are teaching: to fuse the soul into the body, into our everyday lives.
I was forced to do that all the time. I have such a strong spritual drive (that made me happily and with total confidence prepay the Mexico tour two years in advance), only to find that I couldn’t go because I ‘happen’ to have three kids that need me at home. To do laundry, to do the dishes and cook. How spiritual is that? Yes, it is very spiritual, and the ultimate task: to anchor all higher consciousness into ‘boring’ matter.
This post is actually one of the most spiritual and inspiring that I’ve ever read. For me, your words has just as much authority as White Eagle’s. If he hadn’t stepped aside, that would not have happened. Thank you both!
Next step? I’m heading for Turkey, never giving up, but I might end up connecting remotely, this time too. From below the pile of dishes and dirty laundry, with my kids playing and asking me question in the background. That is multiconscioustasking!
Enjoy the ‘L’s’ of your new life…
Late is okay
Learning about your true inner beauty
Liking your strengths and limits
Loving all the new experiences
Leaving the past
Leaning into a different perspective
Losing the guilt
Perhaps other readers would like to share their thoughts also
Let me know if there is anything I can do to support you
JONETTE: YOU are one of the most loving beautiful persons I’ve ever met!
As you practice yoga, stilling & breath, glance at Gangaji or Byron Katie or Scott Kiloby. As much as I truly love this outer manifestation named Jonette, the inner radiance, that Golden Being I always FEEL and glimpse is SOUL itself! You shine inside-out. WHY oh why would guilt be of any viable service? Breathe, release, and flow out into the arms of the Divine essence where you are home with Mark and mark and all of us HOMIES.
Deep and Respectful Loving peace, Dear Friend!!! earth mark
Thanks for sharing. Makes my life look a little less difficult (at the moment)!